Thursday, Feb. 26, 2026

I started a daily blog in 2022. The idea was to upload one post a day in order to establish a daily writing/ photography practice. It felt good to have a rhythm, even if no one was watching. Maybe especially because no one was watching. I wrote random tidbits, and largely posted photos. Nothing serious. Until life got serious. Then my posts got serious. Then for a time, they made no sense. I lost my mind and this blog has the receipts.

I oscillate between being embarrassed and being proud. I’ve landed on being proud, now that I’ve survived and feel perfectly myself again.

I designed the blog to be one limitless scroll, punctuated by text. When I talk I often find myself rambling off topic and coming back to my original point with an “anyway, as I was saying.” I named the blog thusly.

In 2025 my blog officially maxed out. I hit 1k readers/ monthly, and the limitless scroll was officially overloading my website’s capacity. I had no choice but to create a new page. A new blog. A fresh start. Much like I’m trying to make in my actual life.

This is my first official post on my new blog. I’m starting over. It’s completely appropriate for where I am in my life. I’m going to be 33 in 2 weeks, and I’m re-entering my life again. I spent six months from October 2024 to April 2025 in a delusional haze, a parade of orange pill bottles on my bedside. Bipolar disorder—-what variety we weren’t and aren’t sure. If it’s bipolar disorder at all. I had one bout of psychosis that I didn’t believe to be psychosis at all and still don’t. Nobody knows. “A psychotic break” is sufficient enough for most people. For me it’s an insult.

I’m going to use this fresh blog to make sense of what I’ve been through moving forward. A warm up for my memoir, maybe. A collection of my reflections. When I started this blog it was for more or less the same purpose—to make sense of my life and give it more meaning.

I’ve chosen to keep my blog relatively quiet and post only on my own website for both personal and professional reasons. I’m not interested in monetizing my writing at this time, even though at the time of this writing I am unemployed and technically homeless/ dependent on my family. I also don’t feel up to the challenge of promoting myself as a person of influence or status. It feels counter to my personality, and I seek to convey my true self on this long, endless page. I seek to continue healing from the horrors of my life from 2023-2025, my descent into delusional insanity.